7/26/2010

I'm That Mom


I'm that mom who is my children's friend.

Why? Because being their friend means I take their needs - and their wants! - seriously; I listen to them when they speak; if they seem out of sorts, I help them figure out what's wrong rather than blaming their feelings on moodiness or selfishness; I ask for their help but don't have expectations that they'll give it; I don't interrupt them - or I look for an appropriate time to - when they're busy doing something important to them.

I am my children's friend because if they have an interest I don't quite jibe with, I don't tell them it's stupid or ban it from our home, I celebrate their happiness with it. If they're slow getting ready to go somewhere, I see what I can do to help, I don't stand at the door and yell. I happily prepare meals for them, even if they could prepare it themselves, because I know it says "love" to them when I do so.

I am my children's friend because I give them space to explore their own values, I don't expect them to share mine. I don't tell them what they should eat, and I don't say things like, "There's no way you could be hungry!"

I am my children's friend because I am their mom.

Blogpost inspired by this post. And this one. edited to add: There are many links to other entries in comments on both of those links!

10 comments:

Ronnie said...

Oh, yeah - I'm that mom, too.

Flo said...

That is so beautiful, Caren! You are an amazing friend to have. <3

RDuralia said...

Oh Caren I so needed to hear this today! Thank you!

Frank said...

Too right!

Laura/CenterDownHome said...

I do love this, Caren.

~Katherine said...

That's perfect, Caren. :) Love it.

Faith Void said...

well said!

Rana said...

Wonderful mom! I got all excited when I saw the picture of you all in front of North Market. That is my favorite place to eat. My sister lives about 10 minutes from there.

piscesgrrl said...

Awesome, of course! I will see YOU in October!

dharmamama said...

@Rana - That's from our trip to Ohayocon last winter, an anime convention in Columbus. I included that picture because it took some arranging, but we managed the trip so Evan could meet some online friends of his! At one point early on in parenting, I *so* wouldn't have supported his computer time - and it's such a big part of his interests and passions. It was a big YES, that I wouldn't have found without unschooling. (and, I *LOVED* North Market!)